17 October 2010

Not like other people.

This has been a pretty great weekend, despite the fact that I did have to work today. I spent Friday night with The Boy I Currently Like and last night, I got to see my friend Em, who I've not seen in years. Like, five. Today has been fairly leisurely, at least, despite the working.

Em, Kaygee and I are old college friends. Last weekend when The Boy and I hung out with Kaygee and The Prison Librarian, Kaygee and I tried to give The Boy an idea of how we all met and what Em is like. I think he was sufficiently frightened about what it might be like to be around us to be glad he wouldn't be hanging out with us.

It was so great to see Em and her husband. Also always great to see KayGee and The Prison Librarian. The new people I met were lovely, as well. I'm so glad that Em is one of those friends who I can go years without seeing, but when I see her, it's like no time has passed. I think Facebook has helped that a lot, but I felt like this before Facebook.

The only thing that was not like falling into exactly where we left off was trying to explain my relationship with The Boy. I guess it felt weird because it's been a while since I had to explain our complicated mess to anyone.

I hate calling it a complicated mess. It only sounds complicated when I explain it to other people. In reality, it seems not really at all complicated to me. Nor does it seem messy. But then again, I've had some fucked up past relationships. Also, I'm not exactly normal. What seems totally reasonable to me might look like a hot mess to other people. So, I understand why people sometimes can't wrap their heads around how we do things and what we are.

Still, I spent a little bit of time last night feeling like a weird loser. Then I remembered I've always kind of been the weird loser. I should really be used to that by now.

I know my friends don't set out to make me feel like a weird loser. I've got issues and I'm dating a guy who has his own issues. But we're happy and we like each other quite a lot, so whatever.

Even with the trying-to-explain-my-Gentleman-Caller-situation, I had a great time. I wish Em lived here, but she doesn't. She lives closer than she has in the past, though. I am determined to get to Milwaukee next year, dammit.


Emily said...

Awwww, sniff! I know I haven't visited this blog in a while but seeing you reminded me to get it back into my "rotation." You are not a weird loser, my friend. Not even close! Even though I peppered you with the annoying questions about the boy, family life, etc. I COMPLETELY understand what you have going on and the only single, solitary thing that matters to me is that you are happy. And you are, so it's settled. All that other shit just doesn't matter. It was so great to see you and you're right, it's always like no time has passed. That's one of the many reason you will always be a dear friend to me.

Jess said...

Let's be honest -- I am fairly weird.

It was so beyond good to see you. And I totally understand the desire to pepper me with questions. It's what friends do.

Oh, and don't worry about not reading for a while. I've been uber boring for what seems like forever.