30 September 2010

Almost there.

Man. I feel like a broken record. Another ass-kicking week is thankfully coming to a close. Well, last week wasn't a full work ass-kicking week. However, two days of heavy drinking and family kicked my ass enough to be just like work. But with booze.

I fell like a big piece of shit because I didn't go to the gym tonight. I probably could have gone and put in a half hour, but it was late, I was hungry and tired and blah, blah, blah. Basically, I suck. It's not like I've done any of the things I said I'd never get done if I did go to the gym. Well, I managed to trim my nails. And I'm going to clean my bathroom sink area and do my dishes. As soon as I finish writing this.

After family fun time last weekend, this would have been a great weekend to hang out with The Boy I Currently Like. Alas, he's out of town. Drinking with The Boy I Currently Like's Better-Looking Friend at this very moment. I mean, I assume they're still drinking. That's what they were doing about an hour-and-a-half ago.

By the time next weekend rolls around, it will have been three weeks since we last saw each other. I cannot remember the last time I went that long without seeing him. I think it has to have been well more than a year ago. I'm MEGA bummed about it. Like, really fucking sad. I mean, not like, despondent or anything. But totally bummed.

At least I get to have a little fun tomorrow at The GTs' apple fest. I'm not sure I'll be bobbing for apples, but then again, why the fuck not? I'm very much looking forward to seeing the Classy Broads & Co., as well as my favorite CORGI! in the entire world. A handful of CORGI! will cure what ails you, I'm sure.

29 September 2010

This made my life.

Man, Bobby Brown. You know you fucked shit up when Mike Tyson, face tattoo and all, looks better than you do.

27 September 2010

A missed opportunity.

Apparently, with all the sneezing, wheezing and whatnot, my coworkers thought I was sick. Sadly, this is just how I am at this time of year (how appropriate -- I sneezed while typing this). My allergies are on crack at this point.

I didn't think I felt shitty, but when my coworker said something, I started thinking about it.

Okay -- I don't feel sick. But I do feel kind of shitty. I'm sneezing a lot. I'm congested. I'm coughing. I've been using my inhaler a bit more than normal lately. My eyes are itchy. I've got headaches -- either due to sinus congestion, general dryness in my sinuses or because I've been using the shit out of my Flonase (plus, the tension headaches totally unrelated to my allergies). Apparently, I have a bit of a wheeze in my voice. My nose is dry, flaky and kind of raw. Oh, and all of this makes me feel extra tired. Sometimes it's just the allergy-related fatigue, but other times it is the drug-affected sleep (thanks, Benadryl!) or the drug-affected non-sleep (thanks maybe not so much, Sudafed).

But I'm not sick. This is my normal for this time of year. It sucks and as much as I hate to do it, I'm looking forward to the first good freeze. I'm totally open to unseasonably warm weather after the vegetation has been sufficiently frozen, however.

26 September 2010

There is plenty of blog fodder.

However, not enough time. I've got dishes to do. I just threw Brussels sprouts in the oven. There are chocolate chip cookies that need to finish cooling and get packaged for the freezer. I'm reading a book that has me fairly riveted. And it's 9:30. How did that happen?

I can't promise I'll be able to digest the weekend and whatever other stupid crap that is going on to be able to write about it this week. Work is going to be crazy fucking busy. I don't want to go back. But I feel like I've been totally ignoring this li'l blog, and y'all by extension. I'm sorry. Fucking life. Where does it get off happening?

22 September 2010

None of that waiting until the last minute business this year.

YAY! The Twins have clinched the AL Central!

I'm up waaaaaaaaaay too late watching coverage (online and on FSN) because the stupid Bitch Sox were playing in Oakland. But it was well worth it.

I certainly hope this isn't the last late night I have watching the Twins celebrate in the coming weeks.

21 September 2010

Oh, thank you Jebus.

My favorite yoga instructor is back. I ran into her ... I don't know, maybe a couple of weeks ago or so and got the lowdown on her situation. She did miss a few classes because she had morning sickness, because she's pregnant with twins. The manager at the gym then told her she didn't want to take the classes that were formerly hers away from the subs who had been teaching them for a couple of weeks. Man, fuck you, lady.

She mentioned that there was maybe going to be a Tuesday class and I somehow managed to remember to look to see if there were two Tuesday yoga classes. Score! There were! Except, I didn't remember which one she said she'd be teaching. So, I ended up at the gym for about three hours tonight and did a yoga class after doing 90-plus minutes of cardio and strength training. I'm kinda tired, but I feel good.

That good feeling probably won't last too terribly long. I do still have to go to work tomorrow. I'm also really starting to stress about the upcoming family time later this week. I didn't get an e-mail about dinner Thursday night and I'm feeling a bit snubbed. It's not like I don't live in this city or anything, for fuck's sake.

There is other stuff, but I'm really hoping that because everything is taking place in my city; and largely in a neighborhood where I have spent a great deal of time, and I can go home by myself to sleep in my own bed when everything's said and done, things will go much more smoothly.

We'll see. I've had a shitty enough time the last few weeks. I could use a freakin' break.

19 September 2010

That wasn't nearly enough.

How is tomorrow Monday already? It seems really unfair for it to sneak up on me so soon.

I managed to work just an eight-ish hour day on Friday. Saturday, I didn't work at all. I had thought maybe I would work today, especially because I have a short week, but I said to myself "Fuck that shit." That's fucking right. Fuck that shit.

Part of the reason I didn't work was because I slept in, which kind of fucked up my schedule. However, I needed that extra sleep something awful. I noticed late last week that I've been clenching my teeth. A lot. And hard. I've been dimly aware of it for a while, but it's gotten really bad lately, because work has been stressing my ass out.

So, I woke up at like, 8:00 Saturday morning after The Boy I Currently Like and I went to bed around 4:00. When we stay up that late, I tend to drink a considerable amount of red wine. I did so this time and when I woke up, I had a really fucking horrible headache. But it wasn't just a red wine headache. Oh no. It went down through my neck and all the way into my upper back and shoulders (clenching my teeth is actually a new wrinkle to my stress headaches, I usually just carry it all in my shoulders/neck/head). Oh God. It was almost unbearable.

Even after my red wine headache was conquered by ibuprofen, water, more sleep and a little lovin', I still had the teeth-clenching headache. That eventually was replaced by some horrible fucking sinus thing. Yesterday was not a good day for me, is what I'm saying.

The extra sleep last night (interrupted by The New Upstairs Neighbor and Co. herding elephants and moving furniture at 3:56 a.m.) was apparently something of a godsend. I didn't feel awful today; in fact, I feel pretty good. I got to the gym; hit the grocery store and Uptown Market (where I got FRESH BRUSSELS SPROUTS. I'm a little excited, if you can't tell); did two loads of laundry and made fresh vegetable chili and cornbread. Oh, I did dishes, too. Not bad, I'd say.

The chili was part of an effort to clean out my fridge. I made some headway, but despite the fact that I've had only one CSA box over the last three weeks, I still feel like I have a shitload of vegetables in my fridge and stashed in other areas around my kitchen. I did no cooking last week or last weekend. Just didn't have the energy. I hate that. My mom's garden won't have much left shortly. The Uptown Market's last day is coming up on Sunday and we only have four boxes from the CSA left. I only get three of those four, too.

I'm only getting three of the next four boxes because I'm not working Thursday or Friday this week. Can you believe it? TWO DAYS OFF? I'm thinking I really won't have time to work even if I wanted to, out of some misguided sense of ... um, stupidity, I guess. My cousin is getting married on Friday, and the fam is coming to town Thursday, so of course, I took both days off. I don't want to miss out on Family Drinking Time.

Also, apparently most of the fam is heading down to the farm on Saturday, but I don't think I'm going to do that. I think two days of family is plenty. And if I go to the farm, I'll have to interact with my immediate family more and I'd rather not do that. Plus, the Uptown VFW Block Party is on Saturday. I should really go to the last block party of the year, right?

The wedding isn't the only thing going on this week. I'm going to the Twins game tomorrow with the work crew. And Wednesday, I'm going to see Arcade Fire with Law Talkin' Gal and her man. This is a pretty big week. And I'm not really dreading a whole lot of it. So, there's that.

15 September 2010

That's some caliber of employee you have there.

We've been inundated with new people at the company who has the office next door to ours. They also have employees on other floors in our building and in the other building in the complex, as well.

I'm not entirely sure what these people do, exactly. However, their reading/reading comprehension/spatial reasoning/not-being-an-asshole skills definitely leave something to be desired. To be fair, this group is not nearly as bad in the loo as their predecessors were. It's sad when not shitting on the toilet seat is considered an improvement (of course, at the gym tonight there was one toilet with blood on the seat and another unflushed and full of shit. Awesome!).

These new people seem to need some pointers about ... well, lots of things. Since I'm helpful, I'll try to lay them out here.

1. Your Tahoe is not compact. It is, in fact, the opposite of compact. You should not be parking in the "Compact Only" spot. Ditto for your 4x4 extended cap pickup.

2. The "No Smoking" sign means exactly what it says. No smoking. You shouldn't stand directly in front of the sign and smoke.

3. The sign next to the "No Smoking" sign that says "Smoking permitted in designated areas only" means no smoking. It's clearly not a designated area, what with the "No Smoking" sign right there next to it.

4. The sign next to the "Smoking permitted in designated areas only" sign which says, "Smoking is prohibited in this establishment and within 25 feet of entrances" also means no smoking. The statute number should make you realize it is A REAL LAW.

5. Look, if you can reach out and touch the sign, you're too close. Given the print on the thing, if you can read the sign, you're probably still too close.

6. DON'T FEED THE FUCKING SQUIRRELS. And for fuck's sake, don't call to them like they are domesticated cats or something. They are RODENTS, you stupid motherfucking assholes. I'm starting to feel like I'm back at the U. Given the squirrel problems there, that's NOT a good thing. I'm sorry you're lonely, but you're not going to make those things your fucking pets. Get a goddamn cat.

7. Your lunch does not belong in our refrigerator. I'm not sure what makes you think it's okay to walk into an office with a name on the door that is not the name of the company for which you work, walk to the back and put your shit in our refrigerator, but that ain't cool, buddy.

8. Toilet paper and pee go in the the toilet; not around the toilet or on the seat.

9. Paper towels go in any of the three trash receptacles in the bathroom.

10. The bathroom sink is not the place to wash the mud and gravel from your fresh kicks. No one wants to use a sink clogged with mud and gravel, douchenozzle.

14 September 2010

More non-blogging blogging.

I managed to only work until 10:30ish tonight, with a break between the end of the office day and working from home with a little seventh grade football. By tomorrow, I might only work until 6:00 at the office. How sweet is that?

There is no football game to keep me up until the wee hours today. The Twins kicked the shit out of the Bitch Sox, which makes me happy and makes my complete and utter fantasy football failure this week, seem a bit less bad.

Other stuff would go here if I had a functioning brain.

13 September 2010


Too much work. Not enough time. I'd write more, but man, I'm wiped. I can only hope my brain regenerates a bit while sleeping so I can put in another 11-12 hour day tomorrow.

I'm feeling very guilty for going to the gym. I could have spent those two hours working. Of course, that means I'd probably be absolutely losing my shit some time tomorrow (Wednesday at the latest). The trade-off is worth it. I think. I hope.

09 September 2010

Have you been spying on me?

Earlier today, I had a brief moment to read a bit of this story about a radio-collared research bear being shot in Northern Minnesota.

It seems like a dick move, to be sure. I'm conflicted about hunting. I understand the need to control population, because it seems far more humane for animals to be killed humanely/quickly (in an ideal world; I know it doesn't always happen that way) and used for food, than for them to slowly starve and/or succumb to disease because there are too many of them and not enough food.

I do not get hunting purely for sport. Nor do I get the "hunters" who go out "hunting" drunk and high and kill their kids. I use the quotation marks because the guy was neither licensed nor had permission to "hunt" on the land where he was hunting/shooting his kid.

But that is neither here nor there at the moment. What I want to point out is one of the comments on the story:

ignorant city people commenting on something they know nothing about
Bear hunters spend a lot of time and money and normally only hunt 1 or maybe 2 specific areas, for a short season. If the bear they have coming in is a monitored bear ?? oh well, probably would mean not getting a bear for that season if that one was let go. Bow hunting is even a little harder and much more sporting. Not everyones hobby is hanging out at uptown and drinking expensive coffee and judging others...

posted by mnfishrman on Sep. 8, 10 at 10:48 PM |
69 of 131 people liked this comment.

Okay, so you don't really hang out "at" Uptown. You might hang out at a coffee shop in Uptown, drinking your expensive coffee, sure. I want to know how this guy so accurately pegged this country-girl-turned-city-girl's favorite activity? Okay, so I prefer drinking cheap booze and mocking people, but it's pretty much the same thing.

Am I that much of a stereotype?

08 September 2010

I hate to say "I told you so ..."

Not that I said anything to anyone I can now go back to and say, "Told ya!" But I know I remarked to any number of people that this "flattering" bridesmaid dress that "everyone is going to look good in" would look like shit on me.

After work today, I went to try one on/get fitted and place my order. And I now have shocking news: I looked like a big, fat piece of shit in that dress. I tried on two -- one navy and one brown. I was in the brown one longer, as it fit better, and let me tell you -- wearing a brown dress really drove home the whole BIG, FAT PIECE OF SHIT image.

Granted, it was the wrong color, I was wearing the green, strapped bra I wore to work and I'm pre-menstrual, so I'm extra fucking ugly right now. But that doesn't change the fact that I look like a big, fat piece of shit in an ugly, strapless dress.

Yes, the dress is ugly. I think it looks cheap, and I am pretty far from being any sort of fashionista. So, if I think it looks cheap, that can't be good. The idea of dropping $150 on a cheap-looking, ugly dress that makes me look like a big, fat piece of shit -- a dress I will wear one time for one day -- makes me so fucking angry.

At least the lady who helped me was really nice. And yoga has left my non-flexible arms flexible enough that I can zip and unzip a back zipper all by myself. For a dress that runs small, I almost didn't have to go up a size from where I thought I'd be. I did anyway. I have no idea what I'm doing yet for a bra and how that will affect the top of the dress. I figured having a little room up top was a good thing. I'd rather have a dress that's a little big that I need to take in than one that restricts my ability to breathe.

My brilliant plan to do the dress fitting between work and yoga turned out to be not-so-brilliant. Maybe I left work a little late. Maybe the woman who wondered if I was sure the bride was really registered in Minnesota and could it be Mississippi? fucked up my schedule a bit. And how the hell was I to know traffic would be horrible at 6:30? So I missed yoga. I really could have used it tonight. Poop. At least there is booze here at home.

07 September 2010

I wish I had more to say.

I should probably be doing some work, but dammit, I just can't bring myself to do it.

My extra-long weekend was pretty good. Obviously, it started off with a bang in the form of baby animals at Como Zoo. Apparently, a video The Boy I Currently Like took of the baby giraffe trying to sit down in a highly awkward fashion is still cracking him up. The particularly hilarious part is when I say "Yay!" and clap when the baby giraffe finally sits down. I was just being supportive, for Christ's sake! He tried and failed the first time.

Spending Sunday with The Boy was also a lot of fun. The Twins game with the fam on Saturday was mostly good. The game itself was freakin' sweet -- Jim Thome's homers, Matt Tolbert's two triples, pretty good seats, many Summits and a Kramarczuk's brat kind of make for a good afternoon. I sat by my dad and barely talked to anyone else, so my mom and sister didn't bug the ever-living fuck out of me. Really, other than my mom coming in and telling me I need to clean within 30 seconds and my dad calling my apartment a dump, it was good.

Of course, I'm still dwelling on both of those things. I'm sorry I don't keep a super clean house, mom. I'm sorry my apartment has drafty windows, dad. I'm sorry I'm a failure in every fucking possible way and make you regret bringing me into this world. Shocking that I don't want to spend a lot of time with you, huh?

I'm not sure if it's lingering shitty feelings from my parents, the turn in the weather (not all bad -- it's good sleepin' weather) or something else, but I've been feeling fairly shitty the last few days. Today it was more about how fucking ugly I am, but there's a general feeling of I Suck happening. But what can you do? I'll get over it.

Not tomorrow, though. I have to get fitted for my bridesmaid dress. BLECH.

03 September 2010

Baby animals!

The Boy I Currently Like and I went back to Como Zoo today to see the new baby giraffe. We were not aware there was also a baby orangutan. Both were absolutely fucking delightful.

02 September 2010


Okay, it's one vacation day. And I have to do an hour-long conference call tomorrow morning. And I'll probably have to do some work throughout the rest of the weekend. And I worked two 10-hour days this week.

BUT! I don't have to go to the office tomorrow. That, of course, means I don't get my CSA vegetables. I hung around until 6:30 tonight, hoping the girl who went to pick them up a couple hours prior to that would come back with our vegetables. Twas a no-go, though. There's still the Uptown Market on Sunday. And apparently, the fam will be picking me up on Saturday for the Twins game, so I will get vegetables from my mom's garden.

Saturday's so far away, though. Tomorrow, The Boy I Currently Like and I are going back to Como Zoo to see the relatively new baby giraffe. I'm way super stoked about this. I suppose the reasons are twofold: I get to spend some time with The Boy and the pictures I've seen of that baby giraffe are fucking ridiculous. It's SO CUTE. Plus, I'll get a corndog.

There are errands to run, as well. I've been putting off the purchase of many things over the last couple of weeks because I've been broke. So, I have quite a list. There is also booze to purchase. I'm stoked because Byerly's has Hendrick's Gin for $19.99. It's usually like, $31 or something. YAY for cheaper booze!

In between the work and Zoo and corndog eating, I'll have to do some tidying up if the fam is going to be stopping here. I don't want to do too much, because no matter how much I do, my mom and/or sister will talk shit about my housekeeping skills. It will take every ounce of my being to not tell them to fuck the hell off and get out of my house. But I'm trying to be CIVIL.

My being civil made Tuesday at the nephew's first football game a not-terrible experience. I didn't know my brother and SILTB would be there, but I managed to deal with it alright, I think. Several hours on Saturday, though ... but there will be BEER and BASEBALL. I should be able to handle it, right?

Here I am, writing more of nothing. Sorry. I'm just wiped out this week. I meant to blog after my fantasy football draft last night, but I was just tired. I like my team, though. I mean, it's not hard to like your team when someone in your division takes Ricky Williams in the fourth round. At least he's in the league this year.

There was a lot of political stuff I wanted to write about this week, but I'm currently terrified/depressed and just can't bear to do it. I seriously had a moment of "I don't think I can live in this world," earlier today. It was scary.

No mind, though. It's the weekend (for me) and I have fun things planned. Life is okay. Really. It is.