This really hasn't been the best week. I am about 85 percent sure that my hormones are coloring everything that's happening, but I don't think I'd feel a whole lot better if this week had taken place last week. I mean, shit's pretty fucking sad if I'm wishing it was Sunday night at noon on Wednesday. I hate Sundays So. Much.
The death of The Nun on Sunday obviously started the crap week in motion. I did a lot of crying that day, which led to my feeling like absolute puffy shit on Monday. I don't know about y'all, but when I start the week exhausted, it only gets worse from there.
Last night, I realized I no longer like yoga. That threw me for a loop, despite the fact that I knew I didn't really like the class. For whatever reason, the actual realization hit me like a ton of bricks. This is what I told The Boy I Currently Like last night: It's not a challenge. In fact, I feel like she's holding me back a lot of times. She doesn't know her left from her right, a shin from a thigh and is always calling poses by wrong names. Her class has no flow. We get into poses awkwardly. I just don't feel good after. In fact, it often leaves me feeling worse than when I went in. I don't look forward to it.
Without yoga to look forward to every week, I got nothing. It's work, gym, TV, sleep, repeat until I die. I can't even take a fucking day off. I need one so badly.
As if work wasn't bad enough, we found out today that we're getting a new benefits plan next year. This fucks up so much for me. You know, I don't have enough actual work to do. Of course I have time to analyze my health care spending over the past few years and try to predict what will happen to me next year to see which of the three plans would work best for me. Oh, and do I want an FSA or HSA? The plan I choose dictates which I can have.
But what about prescription coverage? Where are my prescriptions -- Tier 1, Tier 2 or Tier 3? How do I know what 20 percent is? When I had a "consumer driven plan" my Advair didn't cost the same as it did when I didn't have insurance, so how do I know the price they're going to use? How the fuck are my birth control pills that cost $36 per month when I was unemployed and UNINSURED, $50 a month with this insurance coverage? Suddenly, those lavish executive perks to United Health are making a lot of sense.
This change is absolutely forcing my hand with my IUD/Essure decision. Even if I get decent coverage of Essure under the new plan (not bloody likely), I can't afford the outpatient procedure plus an extra $150 to $300 on birth control pills while I'm waiting for my fallopian tubes to scar over. I don't even know how I can figure out how much the procedure would hypothetically cost when I'm not even under that insurance plan yet. I kinda doubt I'll be asking these questions when we have our all-company meetings next week on the subject. Plus, if I have to use up my flex money from this year by December 31 instead of March 15, what choice do I have?
At least I have only one more unproductive day left at work. Being distracted and exhausted has done me zero good this week. I probably should have worked from home at least one day, but apparently, our the term server sucks so much ass. And after a shitty work week, I get lots of driving, sadness, little sleep (at least I get a bed tomorrow night) and NONSTOP FAMILY. Don't get me wrong -- I love my family and I will be happy to see them all, even under less-than-happy circumstances. Oh, but ... well, I'll be so glad to get back here Sunday afternoon. So glad.
Then it's back to the grind. But hey -- at least I have cookies.