04 August 2009

Things I've been wondering, mostly at the gym.

Not all from tonight or anything (save for the first), but it just makes sense to have them all in one place. Don't you think?

How does one tactfully call the gym to find out if the smelly hippy lady is subbing for yoga? If I'd known she was teaching tonight, I would have just walked around Lake Calhoun instead of watching stupid E:60 at the gym. Your teaser needs some work, Worldwide Leader. I knew that kid had Asperger's before you finished the intro. Oooooh, riveting!

Have bonnets made a comeback? Not ruffled, flowery, long-ribboned Little House-style bonnets. These are updated. I saw a couple of women running on 38th Street one morning on my way to work. One was wearing a bonnet. It was black, fairly sleek and ... modern? But definitely a bonnet. It looked like it fit with her running clothes ... as much as a bonnet could. I mentioned it to The Boy I Currently Like, but that was about it. Until I saw a woman wearing one at the gym. I'm so confused.

As long as we're on the subject of gym/running attire ... I do not understand the running skirt. I suppose it makes more sense than a skort. Though, I'm not sure it makes much more sense. And I really fail to understand the point of the running skirt when you've filled it out so much that the skirt portion no longer covers the shorts part. I know, I know. I'm a horrible, horrible, judge-y bitch. I have a fat ass, too. But I do try to shield the general public from it.

What kind of industrial-strength facial grease do you have if I scrub your nose and mouth/chin print off the bench of the hamstring curl machine with cleaner, and the print is still there after I've finished my three sets? Damn. I thought I was a greasy bitch. Why do you need to smash your face into the bench anyway? Why can't you fucking wipe off the damn thing after you pressed your sweaty, greasy mug all over it?

Boy, I'm a complainy one, aren't I? I suck.


Reuben said...

skirt? skort? why not just wear shorts? or blue jeans?

Jess said...

Plenty of dudes at the gym wear jeans. I don't get that, either.

Reuben said...

i wear whatever features my package best that day.

Jess said...

As any reasonable man would, I imagine.