10 November 2008

When the big hand is on the six and the little hand is on the seven.

Dear Pat,

Your class ends at 7:30. Your ... step? strength? aerobics? class has mats, weights, steps and God knows what else that your students need to put away once the class is finished. As it turns out, yoga starts at 7:30. No one likes the new schedule. However, Kari teaches a class similar to yours on Wednesday right before yoga and doesn't leave our class starting 10 minutes late.

Look, I'm sorry that you apparently have some sort of disability that leaves you unable to read a fucking clock or whatever. If that's the case, maybe you should set an alarm on your cell phone. Or perhaps have one of your students let you know when you should start wrapping shit up. FYI: the time to start wrapping it up is not five minutes into the start of our class. It's been two fucking months, you dick. Make some goddamn adjustments.

While I'm kind of talking about your students, maybe you could ask them nicely to pick up all of their shit when they are done. It's bad enough that we have to wait for you to go over your time limit and then wait for the majority of the participants to put their stuff away. But it really fucking pisses me off when I have to put away steps and exercise balls that your assfuck students left behind. I hate to be the one to burst your collective bubble, but y'all are not any better than anyone else. You got the shit out, so you can put it away, douchesticks.

It was bad enough that the gym was smelly and dirty. But I'm really pissed that you ruined the warm fuzzy buzz I got while watching our president-elect take his tour of the White House while I was doing cardio before class. I'm annoyed that it's almost goddamn 9:00 by the time I get home from class. I kind of hate you and want to punch you in the junk. I hate that I let assholes get to me and make me crazy.

I hope you all get a virulent strain of gonorrhea.

Yours in Christ,


supertoyz said...

You tell'em sista! I totally feel for you here, that kind of shit really grinds my gears.

Jess said...

I don't even know who to complain to at the moment, since they no longer have the group exercise director's contact info up anywhere. Not to mention the fact that the schedule on the website is completely wrong.

*sigh* Gotta remember I get what I pay for.

Little Ms Blogger said...

Ummm...it is good thing that you have yoga after feeling that rant build up inside....does the yoga help calm you down?

Jess said...

It took me nearly the entire class to cool off. And I was mostly through with Savasana before I could relax the muscles in my face.

Fucking assholes.

Ezekiel Barzillai Smythe said...

It's almost like they ignore the clock because they thing it's good for you to stay on and do more annoying exercise.

Jess said...

I suppose that's true for his class. However, he's actually cutting into my exercise time. I stop doing cardio so I can get ready for yoga and waste 10 minutes cooling down unnecessarily.

Andrew DK said...

Wow. I just landed on your blog from some random site but after reading that entry it's def going in the RSS.

Jess said...

Aw, thanks! Why is it that people seem to enjoy my profanity-laced, angry rants so much?

I feel like I'm back in my freshman bio lab at 8:00 on Fridays. I was always totally fucking hung over and sat at the opposite end of the table, cursing and complaining, while my lab mates dissected frogs and whatnot, all while laughing at my cranky hungoverness.