20 November 2008

Meeting the friends.

After months of, "When are we going to meet [The Boy You Currently Like]?" and "Are we ever going to meet this guy?" and all the other variations, a couple of my friends finally got to meet The Boy I Currently Like.

KayGee and The Prison Librarian came over for a taco buffet, Thursday Night Football and The Office/30 Rock. There was some playing with yarn, too. Despite the fact that The Boy and I had quite awful timing and were ... busy when they showed up, there was really no awkwardness or anything.

For months, I'd been putting it off because I knew that it was a big deal for The Boy. I only met one of his friends a few months ago, and after that he explained why it was a much bigger deal for him to meet my friends than me to meet his. It even made sense.

But it wasn't just about him. I was a little freaked out about it, too. However, I didn't realize why I was freaked out about it until very recently. I thought it was just because introducing my friends to someone I really like is a big deal. That wasn't it, though. I realized the big deal was me asking him to do it at all. Like, for real this time. I'd mentioned it off and on, but never seriously. This time, I was asking seriously.

As it turns out, the big deal with asking him was his answer. If I asked him to do this thing that was important to me and he blew it off or just flat-out said no, that would clarify whether or not he gives a shit about me. And I gotta tell y'all, I was fucking terrified waiting for his answer. Because if he can't be bothered enough to try ... well, then I know it and it's right there in my face and that's where I stand. How could I keep going along, knowing he doesn't even care enough to try?

Once again, my gift for automatically rushing to the worst case scenario had me all worked up for nothing. But at least I was prepared, right? But he didn't say no. He said yes. He followed through. He was great. They were great. Fun was had. A hurdle was cleared.