Wait. Perhaps the better question is: How can you stand to be around yourself?
There was a guy at the gym tonight who smelled so fucking bad. It was the sweaty, unwashed, been-working-in-the-hot-sun-all-day kind of stank. His stench was so strong it made me cough.
I just do not understand how one gets to that point. Whenever I smell some stank-ass person, I always freak out and think it's me. Clearly, I am probably not ever going to become one of those people who can't smell their own funk. I notice mine early and remedy the situation as quickly as possible. God, if I forget to put on deodorant, my increasing stinkiness is all I can think about until I get my hands on some deodorant.
The guy at the gym was probably six feet away from me at first, so I only got wafts of his disgustingness when he was moving air around. Unfortunately, he was on a butterfly-type machine, so there was plenty of air rushing past his reeking pits. I thought maybe if I went way down and did my triceps, he would be done and gone by the time I moved back down to do lat pulldowns and the chest press. And he was. But his stench remained.
How bad do you have to stink to drive someone away from the gym? I might be the wrong person to use as an example here, because I apparently have a fairly sensitive nose. That always seems a bit odd to me, as I am congested so often. But it is true. The World's Worst Wing Woman has noticed it. Before The Boy I Currently Like and I met, he said something about my nose being intimidating. And he's a boy, so he can get a wee bit stinky. But I don't mind his brand of manly stinkiness. In fact, I quite like it.
Maybe there's a threshold that must be crossed. I still like that humid, sweaty smell the gym sometimes gets when it's raining or in the winter that reminds me of the way the little gym would smell during and after wrestling practice.
StankAss McReekypants, though ... God, he was so awful. I coughed. I had to breathe through my towel. I had to cut my workout short. And what's even more confusing was this -- Stinky was walking around, chatting with a variety of my fellow gymgoers. I cannot understand how anyone could stand to be withing 20 feet of that guy, much less close enough to have a conversation with him.
Gross. Take a fucking shower, asshole.