29 August 2008

Do not be ashamed.

Dear Fellow Trader Joe's Wine Shop Patron,

I heard you loudly and sarcastically exclaiming about how your box of beer and wine is "all for me, too." Honey, you do not need to be ashamed.

There is nothing wrong with stocking up on affordable wine and beer for the long holiday weekend. Besides, clearly it wasn't all just for you. Obviously, you are an excellent hostess or a really kick-ass guest. This is a quality many people are lacking in their circle of friends.

I just wanted you to know that it's okay. Shit, I buy several bottles of wine from TJ's every week. I might even go back and get more tomorrow. It is a holiday weekend, after all. What if a lot of people show up on Sunday to drink on the deck with me? What if random people show up throughout the weekend for deck drinking? I cannot run out of alcohol.

Embrace your booziness, sister.

(Drunkenly) Yours in Christ,

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