Spring has sprung.

I wasn't willing to say anything until I knew for sure. There were too many people jinxing the arrival of spring, which is why we had snow a few days ago. Of course, we here in the metro area really only got a dusting on Friday. But still, I should not have to be scraping my car on May freakin' third.

But today? Oh, today was lovely. I went for a walk around Lake Calhoun and had a beer on the deck after. Screw laundry! Actually, I did my laundry, too. It's now nearly 11:15 and I have all my windows open. It's sweeeeeet.

I've missed you, Spring. It's nice to see you back. Let's not fight again.

In my mind, my summer is already ruined.

Man, this imagination of mine sure is somethin'. It's enough on it's own, but combined with my penchant for ratcheting up from next-to-nothing to absolute-worst-case-scenario ...

I have new upstairs neighbors. They've lived here maybe a week or so and they're already on my shit list. Thanks to them, I've already taken two ice-cold showers (and washed my dishes in cool water ... you'll know what killed me when I turn up dead!), which is really great post-workout. You want those muscles to stiffen up as much and as quickly as possible. And a cold shower is really great at like, 10:00 at night. Because the thing you need right before bed is to be shocked into awakeness.

Also, I'm fairly certain at least one of them is M. Piedlourde. They wake me up in the morning, stomping around and have been causing pieces of plaster to fall from my bedroom ceiling (you'll know what caused it if I turn up dead by being crushed instead of falling victim to some sort of food borne illness).

However, I'm not worried they're going to use the deck when it gets nice out. I'm not sure why I'm so convinced of this fact, but  ... well, I just feel it, okay? And I can't fucking handle going through that again. I never did get an answer as to when the designation of the deck going with this apartment to belonging to the entire building happened. Management never returned that phone call.

I can't handle having people out there when I'm in here, 10 feet away, just trying to live my damn life. I lose so much if that happens.

Probably its this GODDAMN SNOWSTORM messing with my head. Though, I thought I'd come to terms with it. Maybe I just think I came to terms with it. I still have my argument about my deck being the one thing that never gets shoveled when the building maintenance people come to shovel sidewalks. If it was communal property, shouldn't they clear it, too?

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna try to talk myself down with some wine so maybe I can go to damn sleep later.

Oh boy, guys. Shit's about to get real.

I am less than 48 hours away from meeting the mother of The Boy I Currently Like.

Wait.

What?

I'm freaking out just a little bit. But then I'm not. It's fun!

We had big plans to go to Sea Salt and sit outside and eat delicious seafood. There would have been people, dogs and trees for me to look at and serve as a distraction. But we've got several inches of snow right now and we're supposed to get about eight total by tomorrow.

EIGHT INCHES OF SNOW ON APRIL 18-19. Can we please stop denying climate change now? Because, seriously. This shit is fucked up, yo.

Anyway, I'm freaking out a little bit about meeting his mom. She may or may not be a little judgmental. Also, I've never met the mother of a guy I've dated. I'm not sure how I thought I'd get away with never meeting the family of a guy I dated, but I've been goddamn successful up until the last year.

I guess that with us not going to Sea Salt and possibly to a place that has no booze I don't have to worry about his mom being scandalized about me having a lunch beer. You guys, I love lunch beers on the weekend. However, I've heard plenty of stories about her saying to The Boy as he goes to get a second beer, "Oh. You're having another beer?"

Hooooo, boy. She would be absolutely scandalized by my family. A couple of beers at a weekend lunch ain't no thang. Shit. We start drinking before noon on holidays. 'Cause it's noon somewhere, right?

So, as much as I freak out about what would she think should I have a beer at lunch, I also think, I'm 39 goddamn years old and I'll have a fucking lunch beer if I want.

The one thing I know, is that I should not be drinking before lunch to take the edge off. I'm gonna have to go to the gym or something.

Mother Nature, you're killin' me.

Sweet Lord almighty. Today was our sixth consecutive day of measurable snow in the Minneapolis-St. Paul metro area. It is APRIL 14. The last time this happened was in February of 1962.

February.

1962.

YOU'RE KILLING ME, MOTHER NATURE.

And everyone is miserable. This weather makes up about 50 percent of my Facebook and Twitter feeds. Guess I have a lot of local color in both. You'd think that maybe since we're all in this together it wouldn't feel so bad. But that apparently makes no difference.

I'm itching to get out and drink on my damn deck. It's currently covered with snow, however.

Of course, with six consecutive days of snow, glimpses of the sun have been very limited indeed. I really need some vitamin D.

There was a point today where I thought I'd take advantage of the dreariness and do some baking and cooking, but all I managed to do was my laundry and then hours later, make my lunch for the week. The rest of my afternoon was spent on the couch, reading and watching TV. It was all I could do. Well, I did get some dog petting in, which is what saved the day.

Back to the grind tomorrow. I sure hope the sun peeks out.

Crow's feet and zits, together at last!

You must be joking, skin. C'mon. 

Okay, so I've had wrinkles under my eyes for years and years, because of all the squinting putting in and taking out contacts and squinting because my eyes are light sensitive because of the contacts. But that shit on the sides of my eyes is new. 

And the zits on my nose come like clockwork every month. 

Honest to Christ, my skin doesn't know what age it is. Not cool, Mother Nature. Not cool 

Hey, remember when I used to write stuff here?

I clearly just have nothing to say. And have had nothing to say for weeks and weeks. I am the worst.

Since my last post (this is starting to feel like Confession), I've watched a shitload of basketball, moved my parents, went to birthday parties and got hammed with little ill effect the next day (TWICE!), got a bonus and a raise, went back to yoga and probably other stuff.

Shit is boring, yo. Work isn't out-of-bounds crazy. Yet. We have busy days/weeks, but I've worked little on my vacation days/weekends.

Maybe it's been the extended winter. It's felt extended, anyway. The Boy I Currently Like and I were watching some of the U.S. version of Top Gear before the GAME OF THRONES PREMIERE tonight, and they were winter driving in Minnesota and the episode made me feel so uncomfortable. It was too soon, I guess. It's only just started to warm up and I'm just fucking ready to drink on a goddamn patio already. Jesus.

Things are looking up -- the Twins opener is tomorrow. I've got lots of shows coming up (Divine Fits, Michael Ian Black/AC Newman Wits, Rob Delaney/Neko Case/Kelly Hogan Wits, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, The National), Sea Salt opens Friday, there are zoos to visit, Law Talkin' Gal's wedding, Girls' Weekend ... FUN SHIT AHEAD!

Perhaps there will be things for me to write about. I hope so, anyway.

I cannot take it anymore!

Oh my God. I'm so tired of being sick. I've reached my limit. I'm going insane.

As of tomorrow, it'll be two weeks that I've been sick. Nearly a week since my doctor visit. I finished my antibiotics yesterday (though, they'll be in my system another four days, I guess). But I'm still coughing, wheezing and blowing my nose. I'm doing all of those things less and less each day, but I'm still doing them.

I managed to go to the gym on Sunday, but yesterday was no a possibility. My lungs were on fire. Today was iffy. I felt great while out shoveling my deck this afternoon and thought, "I can totally go to the gym." I coughed so hard I got dizzy when I came in, though, so I figured maybe I should put it off one more day.

But tomorrow I go back to the office, so I'm going back to normal. Well, I'm going to go to the gym. I'm not so stupid as to attempt a normal workout. I'll ease back into it. But I'm going, god dammit. I have to.

Since I've been tired, coughing and blowing my nose all the damn time, I've not done as much cooking or baking as I would have liked with my "time off." Boy howdy, though, have I caught up on TV and reading. Comics, mostly. But I have a ton of space on my DVR and I'm taking a big ol' pile of comics back to The Boy I Currently Like on Friday.

So, there's that. I haven't been completely useless, I guess. I sure feel like I have been, though.

Long day.

It's amazing to be this exhausted at 8:25 p.m. when I went to bed around 11:15 the previous night. Today was a ridiculously long day, though.

My Grandma died on Thursday and today was her wake and funeral. I've written about my mom's family a number of times over the years, and today has to be one of the final chapters. I mean, I don't see much of a reason for my mom and all of her sisters to get together after we bury grandma's ashes at some point later this year. We split up in the church today on opposite sides, according to the long-ago-forged rifts.

It's so jarring to hear and see the lovely things people were saying about her. It's like all of the people who showed up (WAY more than we expected) knew a different woman than I did. It's so weird. And sad.

All in all, it makes for a really long day. Being sick didn't help matters any. But I got to spend some time with my ridiculously cute nephew and I got to hang with my super-spazzy, cute doggie. So, there's that.

Now, I go back to work after a week off. Most of a week off, anyway. I sure don't feel like I've had really any time off work, which blows. Being mid-cold is only making matters worse.

Oh well. What are you gonna do? I'm showered and my laundry is almost done, so I'll be sleeping in my own bed, all clean and shit tonight. That's one of my favorite things.

Ugh, I'm the worst.

There have been many days since I last posted where I was gonna post, but I just didn't get around to it. I ran out of time/energy/whatever.

And now that I started this post like, an hour ago, I've forgotten what the hell I was gonna write about. Awesome!

Tomorrow is the last birthday of my 30s. I go into it having been diagnosed with cataracts a week ago. They're not age-related. They don't know what causes them. Possibly genetics. Possibly medications, specifically steroids, which I've been taking off and on for God knows how long because of my asthma.

It's distressing and depressing. But, at the end of the day, I'll get medically necessary vision correction surgery. They go in and take the bad lens out and replace it with a plastic lens, which they can make any power. So, they can put in a lens that corrects my nearsightedness and then I'm good. If it works. It'll just suck getting to the point where I actually need the surgery. It could happen quickly or it could take years to progress.

So, now I have to decide if I should get new glasses or not. My actual prescription changed just enough so that I could get new glasses if I wanted to get them. But do I get new glasses if I might have to have cataract surgery in six months?

Oh man.

Anyway, I'm hanging out alone on my birthday eve after having a lovely night bowling with a few friends last night. I was feeling sorry for myself, but I've had some wine and I'm having fun doing stuff around the house. Like cleaning receipts out of my wallet and watching the NBA All-Star Game. Fun!

I've got the week off work and I'm all out of sorts. I have no idea what to do with myself. This shit's exciting!

Exciting hair experiment.

So many time over the last 11 months I've thought about updating on how the no-poo thing is going. But there wasn't much to say. I've been experimenting with products, still; trying to take care of the damn frizz halo I get. Other than that, though, it's been pretty great.

A month or so ago (probably?) I started sleeping with a satin cap, which curlies will know is supposed to help minimize hair breakage. You see, when your hair is gliding across a cotton pillowcase, it catches. But with a satin, it glides freely. I was going to try satin pillowcases first, but I heard they're terrible for your skin, and that's something I certainly don't need. Plus, with the cap, my hair is tidily tucked away and doesn't bother me all night.

Another thing the cap is supposed to do is make it so your hair is easier to style the next day. Maybe you just need to touch it up, even. That hasn't been the case for me, because most days I'm going to bed with hair that's been up in a half-assed bun most of the day and is also full of dried sweat from the gym. Terrible.

I got an e-mail last week from NaturallyCurly.com with tips on what to do with your hair when you sleep. And I decided I was gonna try that shit. So, last night, I washed (with conditioner, natch) my hair when I took my post-workout shower. I even blotted my hair dry with a damn t-shirt.

The option I chose was the going-to-bed-with-crunchy-hair method, and I gotta say, it worked pretty darn well. The crunch was partially scrunched out of my hair by virtue of my moving around in my sleep. I scrunched the rest out, put some Aveda Defining Whip in my hair and went about my day. I left my hair down until mid-afternoon, which is about six hours longer than normal. It was getting a bit weird-looking by that point, but certainly wasn't terrible. Since this is all new to me, it didn't even occur to me to add a bit more product or scrunch some water into it.

I have much to learn. Maybe tomorrow I'll spray it with a bit of water and add a bit of different product. I'll see what it looks like when I get up, I guess. There are a lot of benefits to this new system: I use less water by taking one shower per day (didn't feel icky at all, which I usually do if I don't shower in the morning), I have more time to either sleep or once the Gymmigrants leave, I can get up at my normal time and finish work early. That means getting to the gym earlier and having more time to enjoy lovely spring and summer evenings. Am I getting ahead of myself? Almost certainly. But that's what I do. The Boy I Currently Like finds it delightful, so I've got that going for me.

MY LIFE IS SO EXCITING YOU GUYS!